Burnout

The intensity of burnout is well beyond overwhelm for me.  It is the result of intense pursuit for a sustained period of time.  It is the result of high standards for whatever I commit to or am involved with.  It is the ethics and justice that is required or expected from my perspective.  It is the extreme drive to make a difference.  It is the desire to create the environment for others to experience their potential.

Burnout for me results in fatigue, apathy, failure, finality, the need to hide, withdraw.  It is the void experienced within, no reserves, the lack of enjoyment, the lack of stimulus, letting ideas go or no ideas.  It is not a blank sheet as that represents potential.  It is not darkness as that represents there is light.

Burnout is not caring it is the absence of being able to care.  It is not pain for that is feeling.

Burnout is no fuel to burn, a vacuum.  Burnout is beyond stress.  It is a point of numbness.

Overwhelm can be strategized and result in taming the chaos.  Burnout is drained down to the last drop.

Burnout requires reaching within, pushing through the void to the soul, the center, the core life force.  It requires reaching out to what brings energy, joy.  Burnout requires rest and rejuvenation.  It requires connecting within and with others.  Burnout requires experiencing movement and stillness.  It requires rehabilitation and restoration.  It requires safety and support.

Burnout requires knowing your seed of truth and what will nurture it for birth – growth.  What is the mixture of soil, the amount of water, the amount of light and darkness, and the symbiotic relationships?

The question will arise is this depression?  Is this existential depression?  For me it is not hopelessness or helplessness.  There are tears and then there are no tears.